Here’s how I quit smoking

Hey, so I don’t smoke now! It feels fantastic!

As it says on my ‘about’ page, I’m all about spreading the love. To me that means making sure the message is both general and universal, so that the largest possible amount of readers can apply the tips and ideas to improve their lives and overall happiness. I don’t usually write in first-person or about my own direct experiences on this blog.

Today is different. I don’t claim to have researched this fully, seen it in different contexts or looked at how others can apply it. It’s not a specialist area of mine. This is just what I did and it worked for me. It might work for you, it might not. My advice is do it your own way, whatever feels right.

Anyway, here’s how I quit smoking:

I wanted to

Not only did I want to, I did it for me and didn’t tell or involve anyone else, not even my girlfriend or close family. The journey was mine and mine alone. I think this took the pressure off too, as I wasn’t worried about pleasing others. Also, it helped with the next point…

Not making it a big deal

This one is a little hard to explain. I sort of just let myself know that this was not a hard thing to do. The meaning of things that we experience is mostly made up in our own heads, that’s what I think (I wrote about it here). The emotional, physical, cognitive and behavioural effects of quitting smoking are really not that intense. They are not as bad as having flu, important exams, bereavement, a relationship breakup, anxiety attacks, or many other things that I’ve experienced in my life and come through fine. Stopping smoking is hard because we believe it’s hard, that is the only reason. I didn’t get super excited when I went a day without smoking and nor did I feel that upset the couple of times I gave in and had a fag. Not a big deal.

Giving up the whole thing

When I stopped smoking, I also gave up nicotine (i.e. no gum or vaping) and taking little ‘time out’ breaks. The reasoning was, if the habits are still there, it is easy to pick up a cigarette. Get rid of both the addiction and the habits – I think that really made it easier. Picking up a piece of gum is so close to picking up a cigarette; it’s too easy to go back. This way, I was able to forget about smoking completely, not keep returning to it and obsessing.

Absolute conviction

I didn’t ‘try’, ‘hope’, ‘aim’ or ‘believe’ that I could quit smoking: I knew. Just quiet knowing, no pushing or trying.

Self-help audio

Before, during and after, it was Wayne Dyer 24/7! Not his work on quitting smoking, though; stuff to do with spirituality, love and belief like The Power of Intention and Secrets to Manifesting Your Destiny. I love a bit of Dyer.

Something ‘clicked’

I read this article on Vice, casually, not with the aim of self-development. It’s funny how something can influence us when we least expect it. There was a part that just totally clicked for me:

“It is my job to track and respect people’s choices,” said Cohen, “and especially to help them understand and find new ways to manage the emotions that smoking is helping them medicate.” Some of which, she said, if unchecked can create a distance between a person and the possibility of living a deeply rewarding life.

According to Cohen, smoking, like any other addictive substance, while typically mislabelled as a stress reliever, functions more so as a distraction from issues lying beneath the surface.

“It has been my experience that a person’s relationship to smoking will become less compelling if they are less fearful of their feelings and of their previous traumatic experiences,” said Cohen.

I gained the clarity that as I seek to be a congruent person, as far as possible, smoking is not something I can do any more. I believe that the more congruent our internal and external worlds are, the happier and more purposeful our lives become. Smoking is not the behaviour of a healthy, self-loving person. I realised that it was out-of-date, a throwback from a lifestyle and way of thinking that isn’t mine any more. I didn’t need it as an emotional crutch like I used to. If I am having a problem coping with my emotions, I have so many other strategies now that I can use. Smoking isn’t just unhealthy, it’s no longer necessary.

Hypnosis

Check out Michael Sealey on YouTube: seriously, this man is amazing! I have listened to (and benefitted greatly from) several of his hypnotherapy sessions, including this one (video below). I listened to it once, then again a few days later when my resolve faltered a bit. It really helped with what I said earlier about how we choose the meaning of things we experience – it was a fast-track to changing some of my associations and feelings. I have heard a lot of people say they don’t like the idea of ‘losing control’ during hypnosis. I would say that, for me, it gives me a greater feeling of control. It helped me do something that I really wanted to do, after all.

So, for once an entirely personal / journal style blog post from me with no intention of giving advice. I do hope that there might be some inspiration here, though. Perhaps today is the day that something will ‘click’ for you…